feeling~~~

人需要天父,却不承认,结果把生命弄得一团糟.

是否曾经遇上某些事情是明明自己做不到的, 却偏偏不肯交托上帝?? 硬要自己完成呢?

曾经何时, 我也是如此~~自以为是, 只肯相信自己的能力是多大多大的~~~ 却死都不承认神是万能的, 是全能的~~~

直到事情变得越来越糟糕时, 才来埋怨神为何不伸手帮忙~~~ 那你想过吗?? 神永远都在我们左右, 随时standby为我们担当~~~ 只是, 我们可曾在那时候想起他呢??

就是因为我们不肯承认他是全能的神, 不肯学习交托~~~ 往往以自己的”聪明智慧”来解决~~~ 却不曾想过他的智慧是超乎所有人的~~~ 包括圣经人物当中的所罗门王的聪明也不能与神相比~~~

所以呢~~~ 无论何时何地, 我们都应该先祷告寻求神,再努力的解决所有问题~~~

因为他必在旁指引~~~ 阿们~~~~~

what i get~~~

这几天呢, 我都很勤劳灵修, 读神的话语~~~ 真的得益非浅啊~~~

我读到一篇文章, 题是超级难题~~~

很感兴趣叻~~~ 文章是说, 有个牧师挑战教会的每个人,在21天内(据说21天可以培养新习惯)都不可以抱怨, 不可以发牢骚. 看完了, 还真觉得有挑战性和困难叻~~~

我一直以腓立比书2:14来警惕自己~~

凡所行的, 都不要发怨言, 起争论~~~凡所行的, 都不要发怨言, 起争论~~~凡所行的, 都不要发怨言, 起争论~~~

一直不断的重复着~~~ 也忘了多少遍了~~~ 两三天过了~~~ 原来要这样真的不简单~~~ 但是呢!!! 我发现自己抱怨及发牢骚的次数少了~~~ 希望神会继续帮助我~~~ 让我能成功咯~~~~

为什么一定要成功???? 嘻嘻嘻~~~ 因为在民数记14章里~~~ 因为以色列人一直抱怨, 不断的发怨言, 最终被上帝惩罚了~~~ 我不想得罪神~~~ 我想要讨主喜悦哦~~~~ 各位弟兄姐妹~~~~ 让我们一起来加油哦~~~~ 为了那永恒的生命!!!!!　

路加福音12:15 - 人的生命不在乎家道丰富

在街上, 餐厅, 商场等等的地方, 我们都会看见不一样的人事物~~~
这一刻, 你可能在这看见一个美女~~~ 随后, 在那又可能会遇见一个胖小子~~~
这时候, 你可能幸运的抽到一个小礼物~~~ 过后, 可能在路上碰到车祸就在你面前发生~~~
很多很多的事情, 每一天都不会停止的发生在我们身旁~~~
有些人会埋怨, 有些人会冷言观看, 有些人却感同身受~~~
你又会是怎样看待这些事情的呢???
活了22年(快23了), 我的人生路段并不算太坎坷~~~ 感谢主~~~ 只是, 也并不好受~~~
我常常抱怨为什么我不是出于富裕家庭呢??? 那我就可以要什么买什么了~~~ 我也常抱怨为什么主赐福给其他人却永远都不是我的家庭??? 为什么别的基督徒那么有钱??? 我家却难过得要命~~~ 连自己想吃一餐较为丰富的都难~~~
也忘了几时, 我不再抱怨~~~ 只晓得, 不管什么时候, 我所需要的, 主都知道~~~ 他必定会安排给我~~
现在的我也算是明白为什么神会这样安排给我啦~~~ 我这个人太多欲望了~~~ 别想歪~~~ 是物质上的~~~ 我看见什么就要什么~~~ PSP啦, 新手机啦等等等等的~~~ 想深一曾~~~ 这些东西是必需品吗??? 有的话可以添饱我的肚子吗?? 能帮我解渴吗??? 是不能的~~~ 所以呢, 没钱就不必想那么多咯~~~~ 要不然也浪费了~~~ 若真的要就努力挣钱咯~~~ 嘻嘻~~~
最后呢, 要说的是每个人有自己的遭遇, 不必羡慕不必嫉妒~~~ 这都是神为你和我量身定做的哦~~~
路加福音12:15 - 人的生命不在乎家道丰富~~~~~
上帝应许供给我们的需要, 而非满足我们的欲望~~~~~~

happy-ing~~~

27/10
今天是我这学期最后一个Presentation~~~ 整个过程中, 我们三个女生都没出声~~~~ 因为我们完全不懂~~~ 没份做的原因咯~~~~ 不过, 还好Lecturer还蛮满意的~~~
今天约了芯蒂和Sushi出去Changlun一趟, 吃了一顿. 她们还请我喝茶呢~~~ 真的谢谢她们呢~~~
我们六点回的时候下了场雨吧~~~ 看见好漂亮的彩虹~~~ 可惜我没相机~~~ 不能清楚拍出来~~~ 电话拍出来就这样的效果咯~~~~很开心~~~还想起有彩虹的原因~~~ 圣经说: 这是神和人们的约定, 不再以洪水毁灭人~~~~
我真的要减肥了~~~ 因为我真的很丑啦~~~~也因为这样而没自信~~~~ 神啊!!!! 求你帮帮我吧!!!!!

Penang trip day 3

25/10

从昨天开始, 我们就一直怂恿文豪不要回去开会~~~ 看着他我也替他感到挣扎~~~ 今天醒来时差不多两点吧~~~ 原本打算直接吃了就回的~~~我们吃了Rojak和KFC~~~吃完了就回慧婷家收拾东西咯~~~ H的一句话就影响了文豪的决定了~~~因为6.45pm开会, 如果现在回也赶不及去开会了~~~ 因为回到去应该八点晚上了~~~~~ 唯有决定明天一大早就去搭巴士回咯~~~ 文豪解决了, 可Eunice不肯呐~~~~因为功课还没做完~~~结果还是给我们说服了~~~~留下来在那里做咯~~~

文豪想睡觉, Eunice要做功课~~~ 我, 慧婷和伟伦就去看看慧婷的朋友~~~ 因为有活动哦~~~ 是Jom Heboh来到那地方~~~~

慧婷朋友给了她一盒用Peanut Butter做的饼干和一罐Peanut Butter呢~~~~ 我还和Ribena的葡萄和柠檬拍了一张照呢!!!!!! 哈哈哈哈~~~ 幼稚!!!!

虽然那里没什么好玩, 不过也属一次经验咯~~~~嘻嘻嘻嘻~~~~

晚上我们去吃了海鲜粥, oishii ne~~~~ 虽然地方很不开胃~~~ 但是食物真的不得了~~~~ 开心ing~~~~

还去Pasar Malam买了芋头叉烧”包”来吃~~~ 真的好香~~ 好吃好吃~~~~

能吃真的好幸福~~~~ 但是, 是有代价的~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Penang trip day 2

24/10
醒来时, 已经是快下午两点了~~~ 我们准备好后, 就出发去吃东西~~~ 慧婷带我们去吃猪肉粉~~~ 好好吃哦~~~~而且有很多猪肉哦~~~ 又没有猪肉的臭味~~~ 他们的辣椒很特别~~~ 也很好吃~~~ 真的很想再去吃耶~~~
吃完了, 我们就去了福音书局~~~ 里面有好多东西我想买的叻~~~ 可惜没什么钱~~~~~ 下次去要买很多很多东西!!!! 有项链, 书签, 灵命书籍, CD, 笔记本, 还有游戏等等等等的~~~ 我都想要啦~~~~ >.<
购物完毕~~~ 我们的下一站是海湾~~~ 我们在那里玩疯了!!! 伟伦爱演我们不出奇, 原来文豪也超爱演的~~~~ 哈哈~~~ 我们拍了照片之外, 还拍了MV, 和<<吓到笑 2>>~~~~ 真的笑死我了!! 一路上他们就一直说一直说~~~~ 我就一直笑一直笑~~~ 笑到我快疯掉了!!!! 哈哈哈哈哈!!!!! 伟伦真的无时无刻都在演~~~ 动作又好笑~~~ 令到我们笑声完全停不了的感觉~~~~
接下来就是火锅店~~~ 是自由式的哦~~~ 食物任拿的那种~~~~ 嘻嘻~~~~ 想到都开心~~~ Eunice是最先说饱, 却比我们都还要能吃~~ 真的甘拜下风呐~~~ 哈哈~~~~
这一餐真的太丰富了~~~ 我们吃到动弹不得呢~~~~ 那店后有养鱼, 好漂亮哦~~~ 我还拍了几张照片呢~~~ 还折磨了那可怜的小鱼一下下~~~ 嘻嘻~~~ 不好意思啦~~~ 只是手一时痒咯~~~~~
十点了, 我们送了慧婷的朋友回家后, 我们就去~~~~~ 登登登登~~~~ 海边!!!!!!! 我们在那里聊了好久哦~~~ 真开心~~~~ 还玩了水~~~真舒服~~~
今天和昨天一样, 都是快六点了才睡~~~ 好累哦~~~~~

Penang trip day 1

23/10
我的心不上不下的~~~不知道到底我要不要去慧婷那里~~~很矛盾~~~
结果, 还是去了~~~~
今天, 崇拜完了有UUPG – UUM United Prayer Gathering, 会举行到两点~~ 我并没有打算要去~~~ 我就参爱丰去吃午餐~~
1.45pm
他们还没完~~~ 但是, 听着他们敬拜, 我哭了~~~ 我觉得我自己好笨~~~ 什么都做不好~~~ 什么都不会做~~~ 神啊!!! 求你引导我吧~~~~
原本今天是坐传道的车去到Alor Setar搭车去Butterworth的~~~ 因为传道的车没位了~~~ 所以我们就自己等巴士咯~~~
我们一路上有说有笑的~~~ 满开心的~~~ 所以很快就到我们的目的地了~~~ 到那里已经差不多五点了~~ HT就带我们去吃~~~ 我吃虾面~~~ 文豪, 伟伦和Eunice吃鸡和猪扒饭~~~ 慧婷叫了星洲炒米粉和福建面(我那一带是这样叫的, 慧婷那里好像不是叻~~)来吃~~~
之后我们还吃了白咖哩面, 炸鸡和蚝煎~~~好丰富, 吃得我们好饱哦~~~
接近八点了, 我们就一起去唱K的地方~~~由于慧婷也是第一次去, 所以呢~~~ 我们得早点去找找那地方~~~
那唱K的店名是叫日光~~~ 我们见到了!!! 下去问~~~ 噢~~~~结果好羞哦~~~~~ 那里是大桌球的地方叻~~~ 原来唱K的地方在对面远些的地点~~~~
我生平第一次唱K唱到那么久那么迟的~~~~ 总共唱了7个小时~~~ 是7个小时!!!!!好夸张哦~~~ 不过, 很享受很开心~~~ 原来他们四个都很厉害叻~~~ 我真的有点惭愧~~~ 哈哈~~~ 过后, 我们还去打包了McDonald来吃~~~ 那时已经差不多四点了~~~ 回到慧婷家大概4.30am吧~~~ 聊下聊下~~~ 我们差不多六点才睡~~~ 一天就这样过去了~~~ 好开心~~~

We always have this someone beside us-Jesus Christ

USUALLY, I'm alone doing anything~~~ Dinner, shopping, play games and so on~~~ whatever u could think of~~~
I always give "No common topics to talk to the others" as a reason to keep away from socialize with others~~~ I can actually think of a few topics to start with the others yet i don't want to~~~ Cause I'm afraid that they don't like~~~ Because of this problem,i always walk anywhere alone~~~ then, i don't need to think of anything~~ But i will always feel lonely too~~~
I always tell others that i don't know what to talk to the others~~~ my friends who know me a little deeper than the others knew that I have LOTS of things to talk about!!!!!
Now that i almost always alone~~~ i feel hard to make new friends~~~ i posted a question in my facebook wall before. Asking do i have at least 1 true friend??? The answer is yes~~~ I have this invisible friend - Jesus, that will always by my side no matter what happened~~~~
To those who are alone and think that you do not have a true friend~~~ i can tell you very certain that Jesus will not leave you alone no matter what happened~~~ When you are happy, sad, worry, enjoying and so on~~~~ He will NEVER leave you nor forsake you!!! unless you choose to leave and forsake HIM~~~~~

what we have and what we don't

i saw a picture i guess~~~ its kinda like a comic too~~ i added the image in~~~ But its in Mandarin~~~
it says that: "God is so gracious that He gave us so many things in our life yet we like to blame God for things we don't have~~~~ No wonder we are not happy~~~~"
its true that humans are almost the same~~~ me myself will blame God too~~~ Cause i cant think of anything that God gave me in my life~~~~
I blame Him for not letting me to be born in a wealthy family~~~~ but yet i can continue living day by day while i'm always thinking on how to earn and find more money~~
I blame Him for giving me such a family that full of noise (arguing, nagging, bla bla bla)~~~ yet I'm happy when we laugh together and we learn to forgive each other SO QUICKLY~~~~
I blame Him for not giving me parent that cares very much about me~~~ But i feel great that i can be independent in a lot of things~~~~
I blame Him for giving me such a big fat body that cause me losses all my confident~~~ yet i like my face very much (without specs) and thank God that my body consider healthy (no diabetics, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and so on)~~~
I blame Him for not giving me a determine heart in doing anything continuously~~~ yet I always able to go through problems with the minimum obstacle~~~
I blame Him for a lot of things and i forgotten about the best gift anyone could ever have~~~~ Jesus Christ-my savior~~~ and He gave me ETERNAL LIFE as i believe in Him~~~~
Starting today~~~ we must always learn how to appreciate things even the smallest one and STOP blaming!!! Life would be better!!!!

为什么??

13/10/09
晴天
为什么??我那么爱赖床??我竟然五点才舍得离开我的床!!!!真恐怖~~~
昨晚~~不~~~应该是今早六点才睡觉~~玩玩下电脑,做做下assignment... 不知不觉就到了那个时间...
今天星期二,不必上课...理应可以花时间做完我的功课的~~我没有!!!!真懒惰!!!要改要改!!!!
我的一天竟然就这样给我浪费了!!!过意不去~~~
醒来了~~什么都没做~~~只是玩游戏而已~~~然后上了一个小时网~~一天就这样完了~~
还有,Helen找过我~~~今天开始我可以烘面包吃了~~~谢谢哦~~~
明天八点的课~~希望醒得来吧~~~

faith does it all~~~

Today, my sis called me and told me something that makes me down~~~
She told me that my mum cried~~~ Not allowing my sis to ask her the reason~~~ But in our heart~~~ We do know the exact reason very well~~~ What i can do is pray hard~~~ Nothing much more i can do for my mum~~~ Cause I'm still studying~~~ I feel that I'm very useless~~~ As the eldest sister, I couldnt help to reduce my mum's burden~~~ If i were working right now~~~ maybe she wont be so stress and tension about money matters~~~ but i cant fall now~~~ or else she will fall together~~~ So i prayed to God~~~ Asking for His help~~~ May His mighty hand be upon my family, especially my mum~~~
Then, i sms my mum... Telling her that all the problems we faced were to glorify God's name~~~ Its a blessing when we have full faith that He will help us~~~ My God grant her love, peace an joy... He will always be with us and we will always stand by her too~~
Yes, its true~~~ It is God's blessing in another form~~~ If one believe without seeing... The blessings will be even more~~~ This is what God says in the bible~~~
Though things happened to me or God's blessings for me is only on the smallest things in people's eyes... But not to me~~~ Cause little things are the best way to show God our faith~~~ This is what I think~~~
Faith does it all~~~~

what a great day~~~

I have a presentation today. Its my course paper. I didnt do much for this project-MALAN (advance MA)… So I got to present 3 aspects which are the limitation, recommendation and conclusion… But it is only 3 slides…Our topic was about sustainable development~~
I wasn’t nervous at first, sitting so relax waiting for my group’s turn. When we are out there standing in front, my hand shivered and I think I’m freezing because of the air-cond and there is rain outside. My group’s presentation wasn’t really that smooth~~~ One of us got too nervous I think~~~ She almost can’t go on~~ But thank God~~ She can continue after a while… I pray so hard to God hoping that the presentation will not be the worst one and hope that God gives me peace so that I could calm down~~ Then, when it’s my turn, my voice ‘jam’ a little in my throat… I couldn’t pronounce well~~~ May be it’s already been a while sine the last time I present~~~
After I finished my turn, it’s time for Q&A. I really scared that we wont be able to answer well… I wanna thank God once again for this~~~ the first question was about limitation. I mentioned that the limitation was about our project… So, they were asking what about the limitation for the company to apply sustainable development? Luckily, MY told me before we started the presentation… Forgotten whether she told me because I asked or what~~~ therefore, I can answer that question quite well… the second question was about natural resources. My classmate asked us to give example and something else which I cant really heard what she is trying to ask because she was to far away from us. Then, I just simply answer that tree is one of the natural resources and to avoid trees being cut down yearly with a huge number, we should recycle the papers and reuse the plastic bags. Luckily, my lecturer said it’s true~~~ what a relief~~~~ Then, they asked whether sustainable development is compulsory for the organizations to implement? This was quite tough, my group mates were a little confused I THINK~~~ then, answer just pop out from my mouth just like that~~ “No, it’s not compulsory for the government knows that to implement this, it will cause the organizations to bear more cost and indirectly their profits will be lesser. Thank God for His help~~~ My lecturer said there is no force from the government but encouragement for the company to implement…. That’s the end of my presentation!!!!! Amen!!!!
My group was the last to present. Then, there are comments from our lecturer saying my group was the best presenter~~~~ Woohoo~~~~ happy happy~~~~~ keekee~~ Because we followed the format which lecturer wants us to do~~~ ^v^
Later around evening, NF and SM came to Laluan B to have dinner with us… I don’t plan to go because I haven’t take money from the ATM machine yet~~~ No money in my pocket le~~~ NF insisted that I have to go meet them cause they are seldom here~~~~ then, I agreed and joined them~~~ NF treated me for dinner~~~ Thank you very much ya~~~ Next time my turn~~~
God will provide us with all that we need everyday~~~ thank you father Lord~~~ I love u~~~

Blessings~~~

In the past few months, i have always been praying to God hoping Him to help me~~~
As i wrote in April 6th, my laptop screen is "JUMPING"~~~ My laptop keep on like that~~~ i was very frustrated~~~~ i prayed and prayed and prayed~~~~ It only last for 1 or 2 weeks~~~ then, my laptop jump again~~~~ especially with just a little movement near it, it will then become CRAZY!!!!!
I asked God~~ God, why can't you just 'REPAIR' my laptop so that i don't need to think of the solutions anymore???? Or can you just provide me money to get a new one????
I asked the pc repairing store~~~ it will cost me RM900 for repairing it because the laptop is quite old model~~~ then i told my mum about that~~~ She can't do anything because she got no money for me to repair too~~~~ My dad heard about it and he told me he will sponsor me RM1000 to buy a new one (he got his EPF money cause he's 55 this year)~~~ I'm so happy!!!
Then, i thought about it~~~ Sad and happy feeling comes together~~~ Yes, he will sponsor me but where am i going to get the balancing amount???? from where???? Really makes me headache~~~
Later on, WY asked me whether i can write any short testimonial or not for the coming booklet publication of the CF's. I told her i will try my best to come out with one~~ And that's it~~~ It's out of my mind since then.
One day while i was taking my bath, there's a thought came to me in a sudden~~~ Just like God speaking to me~~~ Telling me to pray and make promise to Him~~~~ Hahaha~~~ Its true though sounds nonsense~~~Then i prayed saying:"Oh God, please recover my laptop and i promise you that i will write a testimonial for you~~~~~"
Nothing happen in that few day, i think about a week later~~ then, i don't know why suddenly i have the action on holding my laptop screen (because its too jumpy!!!)~~~ After a few minutes, my laptop did not jump!!!! Thank God!!!!Amen!!!! And it still staying calm until today~~~~ God bless me~~~~
Then, I started what i had promised HIM~~~ A testimonial for Him~~~~
There's another blessing from Him is about money~~~
I overspent this semester~~~ Like usual~~~ Hahaha~~~~But this semester even more faster~~~ Don't know why~~~ I thought of asking my dad for money after the raya holiday when I'm about to go back to UUM~~~ I don't know how to say it out~~~ Its really very difficult if you happen to know my dad's characteristics~~~~What i do was only praying~~ Hoping God will provide me with all that I need~~~~
When I got home, I have accept a sampling job for two weekends~~~ Selling ice cream~~~ the first weekend was on the last day of Puasa and the 1st day of Hari Raya~~~ The job was tough~~~~ Because the product is soft ice cream, which will melt fast~~~~ There's a promotion on that two weekends~~~ A free plate(rectangular one that fits the ice cream) with purchase of one box~~~~ The target was 60boxes per day~~~ I prayed for God's help so that I can hit the target~~~~ The 1st two days was a sad one~~~ Only around 50 boxes per day~~~ Everyone doesn't wants to buy because 1st day the Malays were still fasting~~~ The 2nd day, was Hari Raya~~ The Malays weren't around may be they need have their day at house or go back to their hometown to celebrate~~~
Then, I told E that I can work for the 2nd weekend too because i manage to get bus ticket after that Sunday~~~~ I also told her I'm afraid that I can't manage to hit the target for the next weekend since the 1st one was not that good~~~~ She says its ok as long as I'm hardworking~~~ I guess I'm hardworking enough but its ice cream~~~When there is sample, children will come to you so quickly!!!! But the parents stay very far away~~~ I think they are afraid that I will ask them to buy~~~ Who knows????
A few days later,E said I need not to work for the 2nd weekend because my sales was not good enough~~~~ I'm sad man~~~~ i asked God why He blessed me with job but I can't get to work for just another weekend??? Why don't He just help me in my sales???? I knew that wasn't right for me to think like this~~~ Then I asked God to forgive me~~~ I believe its one of His plans for me~~~ Two days before weekend reaches, my supervisor asked me whether I can work for him this coming weekend at another place~~~ I told him can but I got no transport~~~Then he says he will call me back a little while later~~~
It seems to be very long time after that call. he called me back again and told me to work for this weekend the same project, the same outlet~~~ I felt very happy~~~God bless me~~~Then, I won't need to think on how to get money for this coming November~~~
The 2nd weekend reaches~~~ The supermarket was very very very empty~~~~ And I manage to sell only around 40boxes per day~~~Worse than last weekend~~~~I really sad because I'm afraid that they won't give me job anymore~~~~ Then, i knew that it's not in my control~~Have faith in God~~~I believed that He has a better plan for me this semester holiday on year end~~~ It was horrible to me~~~~An experience that couldn't be forgotten~~~~
Yup~~~ I have money for November~~~ but what about October??? Another blessing is coming to town~~~~~~
The day before I came back, my mum and I went to buy some groceries for me to take back to UUM~~~ She saw her church friend and she went to chit chat with her friend~~~
Later, she came back bringing me a good news~~ Thank God once again~~~~ My mum said her friend has blessed me with RM200~~~ That would be enough for me to use during October~~~~
Thank you God for your great blessings~~~~~~ ^0^

感触极深~~~

这首歌~~~
是透过我朋友post在facebook接触到的~~~
歌声好~~~
词很动人~~短得来又有意义~~很棒~~~真的很棒~~~
因为~~~~~我哭了~~~~
最后一次 by Lavigne

希望这首歌会让你珍惜眼前人~~~~

天生我才必有用?????

曾经有许多次, 我认为自己活在这世上是多余的. 因为… 我觉得自己根本没有任何长处. 在我身上找到的或许只有世上所有人都不喜欢的坏处. 可以说都聚集在我身上吧!!哈!!
今天, 我去了freshie day. 虽然新生并不多, 感觉还不错啦… 只是, 我自己少了当初那分火热的心.. 之前呢, 有新朋友我都会去认识等等的. 现在嘛, 没了! 可能是觉得自己并不重要的关系吧!! 有我没我, 应该没人会察觉到吧!!! 我想, 应该没有人喜欢被一个又肥又丑的人接触吧!!! WH曾经告诉我, 我很重要的!!! 因为在基督里我们是一个肢体, 任何人都很重要!! 是啊… 任何人都很重要.. 而且扮演的角色也不一样.. 那我的角色是什么呢??? 我也傻傻分不清楚~~ 是我令到别人忽视我呢??? 还是他们本来就不把我当成一分子饿??? 毕竟我们是朋友啊… 可是, 为什么怎么都参不进呢??? 是我的问题还是他们的问题呢??? 答案还在等待中……
WF要我晚上带Junior们去团契. 其实我并不想去. 可是又没人带哦. 怎么办??? 唯有答应他咯.. 如果知道WH有去的话, 我一定不会去的. 因为我没话跟任何人说. 这就是现在的我. 什么都懒得说懒得做. 因为我不再有那个责任去做了. 反正, 都没人会理我的. 我是很肥很丑, 可能是酱吧!! 完全不起眼… 想想也觉得自己可怜!!! 我一度以为, 样貌赢不了人, 其他方面我做好就好啦!! 原来还是行不通的. 因为十个人有八个是以貌取人的. 这是我的看法啦!! 我觉得我能力不输很多人, 却偏偏赢不了人. 很难明吧!!! 我自认, 也算公认啦, 我可以做很多东西. 不知道为什么, 就连我觉得比我差的人竟可以做比我更高职位. 让我完全对自己失去信心!! 大受打击!!! 我真的很不明白… 是神的安排吗??? 怎么我怎么看都象他们把自己青睐的人选做高层的??? 既然已经是事实, 不能改了啦!!! 我那么的不被看重不被信赖, 那么不起眼, 那我做回我真正的自己好啦!!! 一个不爱说话, 不爱透露任何事给任何人知道的我就好啦…. 反正都没人介意…
在团契里啊, 我还是一样咯… 不把认识新朋友当做责任也不是我的兴趣. 就一个人静静坐着好啦… 也不完全没说话啦… 只是和比较熟悉的说说几句罢了. 我觉得自己好废柴的感觉!!!哈!!! 我还要怎么面对其他人啊???? 神啊!!! 救救我吧!!!

时间快转

SH她们计划要去Bukit Merah玩. 原本只有五个人去的, 因为车不够关系吧. 后来就说越多人去越好玩, 结果我们一行七个人去了. 原本想临时放飞机的, 因为有点睡不醒的感觉. 后来还是去了. 真的好难决定的. 我想玩, 却又没什么钱. 毕竟上次放假没什么做到工, 眼镜也花了我不少钱啊… 如果不去, 我又没什么机会跟她们去玩了. 上次她们去关丹玩的时候, 我没去到. 我跟她们之间的距离又差了一段. 如果这次不去的话, 恐怕都没什么参得进了吧…… 我已经没什么朋友了. 再这样下去的话, 我一定没朋友的了.

我, SS和LW 比较迟去. SH和其他人早上七点就等巴士了. 我们三个人十点才等巴士. 我们等了几辆才等到MARA来. 大概十一点了吧. 去到Alor Star, 我们买了票就去Marrybrown吃. 因为一点半才有车去到我们的目的地.

到Kuala Ketir大概三点左右吧. SH还没来载我们, 所以我们就坐着吃ABC. 那碗东西真的是让我们三个人开始哭笑皆非. 哈!! 红豆臭了. 还放一些我们都不知道的果下去. 我们都吃得好辛苦啊~~
今天去了Bukit Hijau看瀑布. 不是说很美, 但还过得去咯. 她们拍了很多照片. 我不喜欢拍照就没什么拍了. 去好了, 我们就回SH家. 冲好凉都快八点了. SH妈妈带我们去吃晚饭. 食物还不错的. 之后, 我们就开车下到北海去唱K. 我们十点多到那里, 两辆车去. 一辆先去, 另一辆去买蛋糕帮LW和LY庆祝生日. 算补回吧. 因为她们的生日都在假期时.
我们唱到三点才回去睡觉呢!!! 回到也四点多了, 隔天还要七点醒来去别的地方. 真累啊. 我的一天就过完了. 好快!!!

岁月不留人啊~~~~~